Every year, the week before Easter, our church has a special week devoted to prayer and specific Bible study. Every year, there is spiritual growth in the church as a result of that week. And every year, that week is full of multiple difficulties and trials.
This year was no different. It was the week that the kids were all at each other's throats, with a particularly nasty brand of infighting. It was the week that the schedule did not go as planned (not that this doesn't happen often, but it was particularly noticeable this time). And it was the culmination of the weeks of mystery bugs.
A few weeks before, the weather had warmed up to almost summer temperatures (well, actual summer temperatures for Ontario). The kids were outside a lot, playing in the newly growing grass. And they were getting some bug bites, of which I thought nothing, because I'd seen some mosquitoes out for an early spring rendezvous. But then the weather got colder and rainier and the kids were inside. They were still getting bug bites, and so were we. And as the tallies started ramping up to 10-15 new bites on at least one of us every day, the anxiety started creeping in. My first thought was "fleas", because we have a dog, and because the bites were consistent with flea bites. But I couldn't find evidence of fleas anywhere, and they're usually not too hard to spot. So then we started thinking "bed bugs"... Uggghh! You know that creepy-crawly feeling you get when you think hard enough about little biting bugs? Well, we were feeling it all the time. We searched the beds, the mattresses, the couch... to no avail. There were no visible bugs in the house, and yet "they" were eating us alive.
So by the beginning of the Week of Prayer, as I was writing on anxiety, I was being forced to actively implement the things I was writing about. My prayers went something like this: "Lord, something is eating us, and we can't figure it out, and if it's bed bugs, I don't even want to think about the cost and effort to get rid of them, not to mention the fact that I'll probably have the creepy-crawlies for the rest of my life! Please help me to cast these anxieties on you, knowing that you are the Lord of even the tiniest, unseen bug. And Lord, please give us wisdom to know how to proceed! Please show us what is biting us! And whether you do that or not, you are the God who brought the gnats and flies in to Egypt and back out again, so you are able to command these mystery bugs to move out. I fully believe you are able to cast them out of this house, but if it takes me lots of work and money, help me to be content in your sovereign care for me."
By mid week, I was starting to feel desperate. I mean, anxiety is hard enough to deal with when you know all the variables and they're just beyond your control. But it's far more difficult when you are not in control AND you have no idea what is going on. And yet, even then, we must fight to cast those anxieties on the one who IS in control and knows perfectly well what is going on, and what the outcome will be.
Now I know that God does not always answer our prayers in the way that we would like, or in the way we deem best. And in those cases, He still has our best in view, and knows we need something other than we have asked for. But I am writing this blog post because sometimes He does answer our prayers swiftly and just as we have asked, in ways so clear that it cannot be coincidence and must be the work of our caring and powerful Father, and I am so compelled to greater faith in His mighty care for us, even in the small things, that it must be shared.
On Wednesday morning, I was so tired of the itching and the kids' complaining and the uncertainty of the source of all this that my prayer was simply, "Lord, show us the bugs and/or march every last one of them out of this house and far away! Just order them to go!" And I believed He could do it, but I admit that I was expecting to be taught some patience and hard work instead.
Well, Wednesday afternoon, as I was doing the laundry, I noticed that the dog's bed was significantly dirtier than it had been the previous day, so I figured I should throw it in the wash. Now I had checked the bedding several times before and seen nothing, but as I lifted the blankets out... yep, there they were - those dirty little creatures, jumping around all over the place. And while many people might be horrified at the sight of a bunch of fleas making a home in the dog bed, I was actually relieved to see them. Mystery solved! And I was ready to take anything easier to deal with than bed bugs. So we did a bunch of laundry and vacuuming, and quarantined the dog outside because right at that moment, we didn't feel up to dealing with a bath, and didn't have the necessary supplies on hand anyway.
Since the weather was reasonably nice, she ended up staying outside for a couple days before we got around to bathing her. But we finally decided we'd better just get it done. So we brought her back in and soaped her up and then ran her coat through with a flea comb, expecting from the number of bugs we'd found in her bed that she'd be horribly infested. But we did not find a single one. Or a single egg. She was completely free of any sign of fleas. And from that weekend on, the bites stopped. I was fairly diligent about the laundry and vacuuming for another week or so, but even that dropped back to its normal schedule, and they haven't returned. And I have no explanation for it other than that God commanded those bugs to leave, and out they went.
So I just want to testify to the fact that God is in control even of the movements and lives of tiny, annoying, biting bugs, and that He cares not only for our major life decisions and great crises, but also for just how long a bunch of relatively insignificant and certainly invisible fleas will be allowed to bother your family. He is also fully able to answer prayers for miracles with the miraculous. So may we be spurred on to pray more often, with more faith, even about more insignificant things.
Monday, June 04, 2012
Friday, June 01, 2012
The Gift of Weakness
Well, I'm still here. May is normally a busy month in our house, but this year's May takes the cake! There was little time for pondering, and even less time for writing. But God was kind to sustain us through the busyness, and now we're in to June, with the 2011-12 school year behind us and a calendar that is (currently) relatively clear, so I hope to be able to spend a lot more time reading and writing (and cleaning and organizing and planning activities to help keep the kids occupied).
Due to various issues related to busy schedules, health problems and parenting troubles, I've been thinking quite a bit this past year about weakness and how to count it all joy. This morning, I was rereading a bit of Give Them Grace by Elyse Fitzpatrick. (If you are a parent and haven't read it, I highly encourage you to put it on your summer reading list - I've found it very helpful, not only for relating to my kids, but also for my own understanding of how the Gospel relates to my practical daily life.) Here is her challenge from 2 Corinthians 12:
"Paul understood that personal success and strength were barriers to his experience of God's grace. God's sustaining power is seen and developed in our weakness and failure. It is never developed anywhere else. The power of Christ flows through parents who boast in and embrace their personal weakness, not on those who think they don't need it. Of course, every one of us will quickly confess that we know we need the power of Christ. Yes, yes, of course we do. But the veracity of our confident confession will be tested in our response to our weakness and failure and to the weakness, failure and sin of our children. Do we see these trials as God's gift to us? Do we see our children's struggles as our Saviour approaching us in love to make his grace strong in our lives? Do we believe that we must have this kind of humiliation so that Christ's grace will flow through us to our family? Do we really want his grace that much? Do we really want to glorify him?"
Due to various issues related to busy schedules, health problems and parenting troubles, I've been thinking quite a bit this past year about weakness and how to count it all joy. This morning, I was rereading a bit of Give Them Grace by Elyse Fitzpatrick. (If you are a parent and haven't read it, I highly encourage you to put it on your summer reading list - I've found it very helpful, not only for relating to my kids, but also for my own understanding of how the Gospel relates to my practical daily life.) Here is her challenge from 2 Corinthians 12:
"Paul understood that personal success and strength were barriers to his experience of God's grace. God's sustaining power is seen and developed in our weakness and failure. It is never developed anywhere else. The power of Christ flows through parents who boast in and embrace their personal weakness, not on those who think they don't need it. Of course, every one of us will quickly confess that we know we need the power of Christ. Yes, yes, of course we do. But the veracity of our confident confession will be tested in our response to our weakness and failure and to the weakness, failure and sin of our children. Do we see these trials as God's gift to us? Do we see our children's struggles as our Saviour approaching us in love to make his grace strong in our lives? Do we believe that we must have this kind of humiliation so that Christ's grace will flow through us to our family? Do we really want his grace that much? Do we really want to glorify him?"
Wednesday, May 09, 2012
Mars and Venus Review a Book
A few days ago, Femina had a post on their blog about girls training their hearts, and one of the points was about girls' tendency to fantasize over characters and romantic situations in books and movies. After reading it, I was trying to explain to Nathan the particular draw that romance has for girls when they read or watch something. I certainly remember many a grade school daydream about some far off day when I would have my own Gilbert Blythe or Almanzo Wilder (not realizing at the time that what I needed was a Nathan Fullerton).
Well just in case I was tempted to rethink the way girls and boys generally view stories, my oldest daughter and son had a conversation on Friday about Robin Hood, a book my son had just finished reading. It went like this:
Susanna: How do you like that book?
Jacob: I really like it. I think it's one of my favourites.
Susanna: Does Robin Hood marry Maid Marian?
Jacob: No.
Susanna: What?! He has to!
Jacob: No, he doesn't. She isn't even in this book.
Susanna: But she's in the movie!
Jacob: Well, she's not in this book.
Susanna: Well, if he doesn't marry Maid Marian, it can't possibly be a good book!
Jacob: Yes, it can. It has lots of cool stuff and adventures!
Well just in case I was tempted to rethink the way girls and boys generally view stories, my oldest daughter and son had a conversation on Friday about Robin Hood, a book my son had just finished reading. It went like this:
Susanna: How do you like that book?
Jacob: I really like it. I think it's one of my favourites.
Susanna: Does Robin Hood marry Maid Marian?
Jacob: No.
Susanna: What?! He has to!
Jacob: No, he doesn't. She isn't even in this book.
Susanna: But she's in the movie!
Jacob: Well, she's not in this book.
Susanna: Well, if he doesn't marry Maid Marian, it can't possibly be a good book!
Jacob: Yes, it can. It has lots of cool stuff and adventures!
Monday, May 07, 2012
Precious Dogs
The other night, we were talking to the kids about what fighting sin looks like, and as an illustration to show them that it really is fighting, and not too pretty, Nathan asked them what they would do if a big dog ran at them and started attacking them. He then described how they would fight back - kicking and pushing and punching and yelling and doing everything they could to get the dog off of them. And their immediate question was, "But what if it was the neighbour's dog? Or what if it was Coco (our dog)? We wouldn't want to hurt her."
Sounds kind of silly, because you and I know that if you were being attacked by a dog, any dog, the survival instinct would kick in and it wouldn't matter so much whose dog it was. You'd just want to come away as whole as possible, and you'd do whatever it took to come out the winner in that fight. At the time, we kind of dismissed the kids' question as childish and ignorant.
But it occurred to me later, as I thought about it, that when it comes to fighting sin, we often ask the very same question. We are willing and eager to fight those big ugly sins out there, the ones that don't come too close to us on a daily basis, the ones that look mean and vicious to begin with. You know, like stealing expensive electronics, or having an affair or an abortion, or killing someone out of revenge. We won't even go close enough to those sins to risk being attacked by them.
But what about those cute little sins that are close to us? The ones that help us keep a good reputation with our neighbours? The ones that sit in our home and make us feel all warm and cuddly? We all have little pet sins that we keep close to us, even as they bite us in the face. We rationalize, "Maybe it causes a little damage, but it's only a little damage, and if I really fight it, I might damage something precious to me. Not to mention that fighting is hard and requires effort. I'd rather just sit here and stroke my sweet puppy dog."
It might be pride that manifests itself in working too long and too hard to get everything done (I wouldn't know anything about that!), even when it creates tension in relationships and unhealthy physical strain. But if I stop working, and humble myself, the house will get out of control and I won't feel good about my home management. It might be anxiety over my circumstances that I justify because if I don't think through every possibility, I won't be prepared, or my life might spin out of control. It might be subtle hatred of certain people that is okay because I don't actually do anything overtly mean to them, and besides, they deserve it for their nasty attitude. It might be laziness that shows up in wasting hours of precious time on facebook because if I actually gave it up or cut back my usage, I might miss something important or interesting. I mean, I might even hurt a friend if I didn't see and "like" any of her posts today!
We find all sorts of creative ways to justify "little", "respectable" sins in our lives. If it gives us any perk at all, we rationalize it. If our sin results in any extra self-esteem ("Good job, Sarah! You finished your to-do list!), any positive change in our reputation ("I'm not really lying; it's just a little exaggeration!" ), any extra pleasure ("A little time browsing the internet never hurt anyone, right?), we are reluctant to fight it, quick to make excuses. We weigh our sin and its benefits in the balance, and find obedience wanting.
But when the Bible says "the wages of sin is death" (Romans 6:23), it's not just referring to gross immorality, heinous crimes. Any sin, even taking one bite of one piece of forbidden fruit, is enough to separate us from a holy God forever and be fully deserving of the full blast of His wrath. We think of these sins as harmless, but we don't see the ugly, deforming damage they are doing to us. We don't see the devil behind them, pulling us down and away from God. We ignore the death threats for the sake of preserving our nice little pet sins.
Christian, Christ bought us with his own blood to save us from God's wrath, not only against our great rebellions and large transgressions. He bought us to save us from God's wrath against our little prides, our little anxieties, our little white lies, our poor stewardship, our small outbursts of anger. John says that "God is light, and in him is no darkness at all. If we say we have fellowship with him while we walk in the darkness, we lie and do not practise the truth... If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us... If we say we have not sinned, we make him a liar, and his word is not in us." (1 John 1:5,6,8,10) We must fight to stay in the light, to confess our sins--no matter how small, to live in holiness in all we think, say and do.
And the glorious news of 1 John is that "If we walk in the light as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another and the blood of Jesus his Son cleanses us from all sin... If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." (1 John 1:7,9) There is forgiveness for all sins, both big and small. But we must repent of them and pursue holiness!
Are you stroking your dear pet dog even as it destroys you? Or are you willing to put that rabid dog down for your own safety and well-being, and for God's glory in your life?
Sounds kind of silly, because you and I know that if you were being attacked by a dog, any dog, the survival instinct would kick in and it wouldn't matter so much whose dog it was. You'd just want to come away as whole as possible, and you'd do whatever it took to come out the winner in that fight. At the time, we kind of dismissed the kids' question as childish and ignorant.But it occurred to me later, as I thought about it, that when it comes to fighting sin, we often ask the very same question. We are willing and eager to fight those big ugly sins out there, the ones that don't come too close to us on a daily basis, the ones that look mean and vicious to begin with. You know, like stealing expensive electronics, or having an affair or an abortion, or killing someone out of revenge. We won't even go close enough to those sins to risk being attacked by them.
But what about those cute little sins that are close to us? The ones that help us keep a good reputation with our neighbours? The ones that sit in our home and make us feel all warm and cuddly? We all have little pet sins that we keep close to us, even as they bite us in the face. We rationalize, "Maybe it causes a little damage, but it's only a little damage, and if I really fight it, I might damage something precious to me. Not to mention that fighting is hard and requires effort. I'd rather just sit here and stroke my sweet puppy dog."
It might be pride that manifests itself in working too long and too hard to get everything done (I wouldn't know anything about that!), even when it creates tension in relationships and unhealthy physical strain. But if I stop working, and humble myself, the house will get out of control and I won't feel good about my home management. It might be anxiety over my circumstances that I justify because if I don't think through every possibility, I won't be prepared, or my life might spin out of control. It might be subtle hatred of certain people that is okay because I don't actually do anything overtly mean to them, and besides, they deserve it for their nasty attitude. It might be laziness that shows up in wasting hours of precious time on facebook because if I actually gave it up or cut back my usage, I might miss something important or interesting. I mean, I might even hurt a friend if I didn't see and "like" any of her posts today!
We find all sorts of creative ways to justify "little", "respectable" sins in our lives. If it gives us any perk at all, we rationalize it. If our sin results in any extra self-esteem ("Good job, Sarah! You finished your to-do list!), any positive change in our reputation ("I'm not really lying; it's just a little exaggeration!" ), any extra pleasure ("A little time browsing the internet never hurt anyone, right?), we are reluctant to fight it, quick to make excuses. We weigh our sin and its benefits in the balance, and find obedience wanting.
But when the Bible says "the wages of sin is death" (Romans 6:23), it's not just referring to gross immorality, heinous crimes. Any sin, even taking one bite of one piece of forbidden fruit, is enough to separate us from a holy God forever and be fully deserving of the full blast of His wrath. We think of these sins as harmless, but we don't see the ugly, deforming damage they are doing to us. We don't see the devil behind them, pulling us down and away from God. We ignore the death threats for the sake of preserving our nice little pet sins.
Christian, Christ bought us with his own blood to save us from God's wrath, not only against our great rebellions and large transgressions. He bought us to save us from God's wrath against our little prides, our little anxieties, our little white lies, our poor stewardship, our small outbursts of anger. John says that "God is light, and in him is no darkness at all. If we say we have fellowship with him while we walk in the darkness, we lie and do not practise the truth... If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us... If we say we have not sinned, we make him a liar, and his word is not in us." (1 John 1:5,6,8,10) We must fight to stay in the light, to confess our sins--no matter how small, to live in holiness in all we think, say and do.
And the glorious news of 1 John is that "If we walk in the light as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another and the blood of Jesus his Son cleanses us from all sin... If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." (1 John 1:7,9) There is forgiveness for all sins, both big and small. But we must repent of them and pursue holiness!
Are you stroking your dear pet dog even as it destroys you? Or are you willing to put that rabid dog down for your own safety and well-being, and for God's glory in your life?
Monday, April 30, 2012
Hope and Help for the Trials of Motherhood: In Conclusion
A Father's Dominion
"Likewise, you who are younger, be subject to the elders. Clothe yourselves, all of you, with humility toward one another, for God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.' Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you. Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. Resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same kinds of suffering are being experienced by your brotherhood throughout the world. And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you. To him be the dominion forever and ever. Amen." (1 Peter 5:5-11)
Motherhood is hard. It is full of little daily trials - bickering children, runny noses, spilled milk, stains on a freshly-laundered shirt, fatigue. It is also often full of bigger, harder trials - Christmas Day trips to the ER, car accidents, rebellious children, severe financial stresses, breast cancer, miscarriages, deaths in the family.
But how thankful we can be that in the midst of all these trials, we serve the God who is King over the universe, Ruler of the nations, Sovereign over every detail - big and small - of our lives! How thankful we should be that we are not in control, that our good does not depend on us but rather sits on the shoulders of the Governor of all the earth.
1 Peter 5:5-11 was written to give hope and help to suffering Christians, and it is no mistake that Peter ends this passage with a doxology praising God for His dominion, His sovereignty, His eternal kingship.
It is God's kingship that informs every promise of 1 Peter 5, and it is God's kingship that should motivate us to obey every command of 1 Peter 5.
We seek to submit to those in leadership over us - both in the church and in our home - because we know that they are in those positions of leadership by the sovereign placement of God. We do not proudly trust our own understanding, but listen to their wisdom because we trust that God uses His leaders in carrying out His plans for us.
We desire to be humble in share our struggles and needs with other believers, serving them and allowing them to serve us, because we acknowledge that we are not in control; we are not the rulers of our lives. We are not proud, because the King of the Universe opposes the proud, but gives grace to those who are humble, and we desperately need the grace of our Sovereign Lord. And God has ordained to give us grace through His Body when we humbly share our lives with them.
We are content under the mighty hand of God`s kingship, because we know that in His sovereignty, He dispenses both trials and blessings to work out His good plan for our lives. We do not assert an ability to decide what is best for us, but rather joyfully entrust both our pleasant days and our excruciating days to the Mighty King of all.
We are not anxious about anything, but in everything present our requests to Him who sits on the throne, by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving that He is sovereignly working all things to our good. We need not be anxious, because our lives are not under our control, but under the control of the powerful King who cares for us.
We are alert to the devil`s prowling, fully aware that he opposes the reign of our King and would like nothing better than to destroy His kingdom and people. But we have a confident alertness because we know that our King has already won the victory over Satan, and that Satan must submit to His authority. We resist the devil, firm in our faith in the Master of all things.
We are comforted by the fellowship of suffering with other believers, thankful that our caring Sovereign has not left us to manage this world and the devil on our own as individuals, but is building a kingdom of comforted sufferers who work together by His Spirit to build each other up in Christ.
We are full of hope in all circumstances because our eternal future is in the hands of the Ruler of history who has called us and promised to wipe every tear from our eyes as He restores, confirms, strengthens and establishes us in His eternal glory in Christ.
God's hope for every mother is much more than a life of enduring, grinding existence until her sad life is done and she goes to her grave. Much more! And 1 Peter 5 gives us wisdom to walk in and hope to cling to, so that we can be joy-filled, humble, confident, loving, serving mothers who glorify our God and Saviour, to whom be the dominion forever and ever. Amen!
"Likewise, you who are younger, be subject to the elders. Clothe yourselves, all of you, with humility toward one another, for God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.' Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you. Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. Resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same kinds of suffering are being experienced by your brotherhood throughout the world. And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you. To him be the dominion forever and ever. Amen." (1 Peter 5:5-11)
Motherhood is hard. It is full of little daily trials - bickering children, runny noses, spilled milk, stains on a freshly-laundered shirt, fatigue. It is also often full of bigger, harder trials - Christmas Day trips to the ER, car accidents, rebellious children, severe financial stresses, breast cancer, miscarriages, deaths in the family.
But how thankful we can be that in the midst of all these trials, we serve the God who is King over the universe, Ruler of the nations, Sovereign over every detail - big and small - of our lives! How thankful we should be that we are not in control, that our good does not depend on us but rather sits on the shoulders of the Governor of all the earth.
1 Peter 5:5-11 was written to give hope and help to suffering Christians, and it is no mistake that Peter ends this passage with a doxology praising God for His dominion, His sovereignty, His eternal kingship.
It is God's kingship that informs every promise of 1 Peter 5, and it is God's kingship that should motivate us to obey every command of 1 Peter 5.
We seek to submit to those in leadership over us - both in the church and in our home - because we know that they are in those positions of leadership by the sovereign placement of God. We do not proudly trust our own understanding, but listen to their wisdom because we trust that God uses His leaders in carrying out His plans for us.
We desire to be humble in share our struggles and needs with other believers, serving them and allowing them to serve us, because we acknowledge that we are not in control; we are not the rulers of our lives. We are not proud, because the King of the Universe opposes the proud, but gives grace to those who are humble, and we desperately need the grace of our Sovereign Lord. And God has ordained to give us grace through His Body when we humbly share our lives with them.
We are content under the mighty hand of God`s kingship, because we know that in His sovereignty, He dispenses both trials and blessings to work out His good plan for our lives. We do not assert an ability to decide what is best for us, but rather joyfully entrust both our pleasant days and our excruciating days to the Mighty King of all.
We are not anxious about anything, but in everything present our requests to Him who sits on the throne, by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving that He is sovereignly working all things to our good. We need not be anxious, because our lives are not under our control, but under the control of the powerful King who cares for us.
We are alert to the devil`s prowling, fully aware that he opposes the reign of our King and would like nothing better than to destroy His kingdom and people. But we have a confident alertness because we know that our King has already won the victory over Satan, and that Satan must submit to His authority. We resist the devil, firm in our faith in the Master of all things.
We are comforted by the fellowship of suffering with other believers, thankful that our caring Sovereign has not left us to manage this world and the devil on our own as individuals, but is building a kingdom of comforted sufferers who work together by His Spirit to build each other up in Christ.
We are full of hope in all circumstances because our eternal future is in the hands of the Ruler of history who has called us and promised to wipe every tear from our eyes as He restores, confirms, strengthens and establishes us in His eternal glory in Christ.
God's hope for every mother is much more than a life of enduring, grinding existence until her sad life is done and she goes to her grave. Much more! And 1 Peter 5 gives us wisdom to walk in and hope to cling to, so that we can be joy-filled, humble, confident, loving, serving mothers who glorify our God and Saviour, to whom be the dominion forever and ever. Amen!
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